How to write band 9 body paragraph in IELTS essay?

How to write fully supporting band 9 body paragraph with examples in IELTS essay?

In this module, we will learn: 

• Common mistake. 
• Why main body (supporting) paragraphs are so important and what a band 9 paragraph must-have. 
• Structure of a good supporting paragraph. 
• How to write: 
  • Topic sentence 
  • Explanations 
  • Examples 

Common Mistake 

• Too many ideas.
• Undeveloped ideas.
• No explanation or examples. 
• Firstly, secondly, thirdly, finally. 

Why are they so important? 

• 70 – 80% of your essay. 
• Make your opinion clear throughout the whole essay. 
• Fully address all parts of the task. 
• Present a fully developed position, with relevant, fully extended and well-supported ideas. 

Structure 

• Topic sentence. 
• Explanation sentence. 
• Example. 

Example Question

In some countries, an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is, therefore, necessary for the government to impose a higher tax on this kind of food.
Do you agree? 

Example – Using ideas from the introduction 

It is argued that states should charge fast food companies more tax because of the growing amount of men and women with health conditions associated with this type of food. This essay totally agrees with that statement because these illnesses cost the health service too much money and increasing the price of junk food would reduce the demand for it. 

Example (Body paragraph)

The obesity-related illness cost the taxpayer billions of dollars every year. People who overeat fast food are more likely to suffer from diseases, such as heart disease and diabetes. As a result, they have to go to the hospital more regularly for treatment, and this puts a strain on the health service. For example, The United Kingdom’s National Health Service is expected to spend more than $2 billion on diabetes in 2015. 

Topic sentences are : 

• A short, clear statement about what the paragraph is about. 
• Often directly answer the question. 
• Not much detail. That comes later. 
• Make your main idea clear. 
• Can’t write one unless you have clear ideas already. 

Topic sentence – why use them?

• Introduction to the main body paragraph. 
• Always think of the reader. 
• Make it easier to understand the rest of your paragraph; link signpost to drivers. 
• Links to the main ideas in your introduction. 

Example (Body paragraph)

It is argued that states should charge fast food companies more tax because of the growing amount of men and women with health condition associated with this type of food. This essay totally agrees with that statement because these illnesses cost the health service too much money and increasing the price of junk food would reduce the demand for it. 

 Another reason why fast food restaurant should pay extra tax is to raise the cost decrease demand. 

So what? 

• One of the biggest difference between writing and speaking is you can’t ask the writer any question.
•  One of the biggest mistakes is not explaining. 
• So what? 
• Keep asking yourself – why, how, where, when, what’s the result? 

Explanation 

• Pretend that you are writing to someone with no knowledge of the subject. 
• Clearly explain 
• What your topic sentence means. 
• How it answers the question and 
• What the result is. 
• Should be a 2 -3 sentence. 

Example (Body paragraph)

Another reason why fast food restaurant should pay extra tax is to raise the cost and decrease demand. Any extra would be added to the reasonable price of the food, and as prices go up, fewer people will be able to afford to buy fatty food. Therefore, this would reduce the amount of junk food people are eating, and the result would be a skinnier and healthier nation. 

Useful language

• This is to say
• In other words
• This is because
• The reason is
• As a result
• Therefore

Using Examples

• Examples help us to support and illustrate our main point 
• You probably do this every day. 
• Think of it as evidence on a court case. 

Using examples 

• Personal stories. 
• Real examples. 
• Statistics. 
• News stories. 
• Surveys
• Academic studies

Personal example 

For example, I used to smoke 20 cigarettes every day, but the government kept increasing the tax, and now I cannot afford to smoke. 

Real Example 

For example, when the duty on cigarettes is raised each year in the UK, more people quit smoking, and this has a knock-on effect on the number of people dying from lung cancer and other smoking-related diseases. 

Survey 

For example, the Sunday Times recently asked several people if they would buy a hamburger if it were over $5, and most people said no. 

Academic study 

For example, Oxford University recently reported that people would not eat fast food if it cost more than $10.

How to think of examples 

• Make them up! The examiners will never check them. 
• Just make sure that are believable. 
• Think of one of the categories above and make up an example that supports your opinion.

Conclusion:

In this post, we learned the importance of body paragraphs and what it should contain, how to support ideas and how to write body paragraphs that impress IELTS examiner.

Some more tips:

• Tips for IELTS advantages and disadvantages essay
• Tips for IELTS discussion essay
• Tips for IELTS opinion essay

Credits :

Image : “Photo by Green Chameleon on Unsplash”